The Writing Coach's Guide to FINALLY Writing Your Book!

Chapter 2: Dream Big and Manage Your Expectations Along with clearly identifying your individual reasons for wanting to write your book, it's also important that you begin to think about what your expectations are for this book. This step requires a bit of a balancing act, because I do want to encourage you to dream BIG, and at the same time help you to manage any truly unrealistic expectations that will set you up for disappointment. This might sound like a contradiction in terms - "Dream big, but not TOO big" - but stick with me and it will become clear. Most of us are afraid to dream big. We tell ourselves that we are afraid of failing or of being disappointed if we don't achieve our dreams, so why bother to dream big? Many of us got into this bad habit of negative thinking because we were influenced by someone whose own ability to dream was stifled in some way. There is nothing wrong with dreaming big. If there were not people in the world who were willing to have big, outrageous, impossible-sounding dreams, there would be no innovation, no technological advances, and no creativity. From the wheel to the steam engine to the space shuttle; from the first radio broadcast to Internet "streaming" audio to the ability to download your favorite music to an iPod, everything we use or see in daily life started out as someone else's big, crazy dream. I encourage my clients to dream so big that they may never actually achieve the dream. That may sound like I'm setting my clients up for a big fall, but in reality we all need to strive for something that's bigger than we think can manage. If we set our sights only on the things we knew for sure we can achieve, we'd barely bother to get out of bed in the morning because there would be nothing to challenge us and no adventure. Life would be very boring and dull. When my clients tell me they have a certain goal, I ask, "Are you sure you can achieve it?" If they say yes, then I up the ante: "So what would make this goal so big and exciting to you that you fear you might not be able to do it?" When they get to the point where they can visualize it being possible but where there is an element of uncertainty, then the goal is big enough to give them something to reach for. It's not always easy to know what is realistic and what is not. No one, including me, can tell you definitively what is realistic in your situation, with your book. Having said that, you do need to think about what you expect, and allow yourself to stretch the limits of what you think is possible.