Hello! I’m delighted to connect with you! I wrote this book because it brings me great joy to help people connect with their true potential to live a life they love and desire! This message of worth and purpose is for those who desire to increase their self-worth and create greater meaning, joy and fulfillment in their lives, and for people who work with or support others with this desire.
Living your true potential is not a destination, but rather, a constant discovery and unfolding of the greatness and truth of what you are. I define success as living your true potential, and your true potential evolves as you learn and grow. As you trust stepping out of your comfort zone, your state of consciousness expands to open up and create space for your heart’s desires, leading you toward true joy and fulfillment.
I have a deep heart connection with the message in this book because I have struggled with self-worth, and having a meaningful purpose throughout much of my life. While this book is not about me, I do share with you some of my own experiences. The exercises and insights in this book have helped me transform my life, and become more empowered, joyful and fulfilled. I’m excited to share them with you!
I’ve had experiences that have caused great pain including abandonment, addiction, abuse, poverty and judgments from other people. I formed deep seeded beliefs around these experiences that I wasn’t good enough, that I didn’t have enough, and that life was a struggle for survival. As a result of buying into these beliefs, I suffered from low self-esteem, addiction, suicidal tendencies, self mutilation and engaging in relationships that were not healthy for me. I had a need to prove I was worthy, that I was good enough, and that I had a reason to exist (because, inside, I didn’t believe it).
I looked for things outside of myself to convince me that I was worthy of being loved and accepted. I tried to be whatever somebody else wanted me to be to gain their approval, love and acceptance, and I often lost sense of myself in that process. I did things I didn’t want to do, and sacrificed my own needs, to please other people. I didn’t pursue the relationships I desired because I believed I wasn’t good enough. I attracted partners that were needy so that I felt I had a purpose, or I attracted partners who “weren’t available” to feed my belief that I wasn’t good enough. Emotionally, I distanced myself from most people because it felt safer. I tried to hide my belief of being unworthy by being a perfectionist (because if I’m perfect, I must be good enough). I felt so alone, even though I had friends and family. I didn’t know who I was or what I really wanted. I was not enjoying my life, so I would drink alcohol and smoke cigarettes to try to escape from or cope with the stress and pressure of trying to prove my worth and avoid feeling unfulfilled.
Living in this story was so energy consuming, but I was not even aware that I was living it. It wasn’t until I became conscious of where I was internally in my life, when I’d had enough of the struggle, and admitted that I was not truly happy (even though I did all this work to be “perfect”), that I realized that I believed that there was more to life than this.
I started an inner dialogue with Creator. This was a whole new experience for me because I had never had a relationship with God. At least, not with a God that I felt could love and believe in me. I had felt abandoned by God (because I wasn’t good enough). I had been brought up to believe that God was a religion and since I wasn’t any certain religion, I wasn’t connected to God. So I became a spiritual seeker. Eventually, I realized I had been connected to Creator all along, and I was not separate (nor had I ever been).
I worked on forgiving myself for believing I wasn’t good enough (and all the things I did in response to that illusion), and I connected with my spirituality on a deeper level. I took classes, joined groups and continued discovering my connection with Source. I had a strong desire to find out who I was and why I was here. Saying “yes” to this desire brought many teachers into my life to help me. I learned we never do it alone and I had to open up and trust. I had done a great job of not depending on anyone, and inviting people in to help me was difficult at first.
Eventually, I developed the courage, faith and strength to make significant changes in my internal and external life. It is a process, and one step leads to the next. Before I knew it, I couldn’t believe how far I’d come in shifting out of my pain and into my joy! The changes were not easy, but definitely worth it! I finally ended an unhealthy relationship of two years, quit my habits of excessive drinking and smoking, let go of many relationships where I had engaged in this behavior, and I gave up a house that was causing me a lot of stress (even though it ruined my “perfect” credit). My desire to help others discover their divine connection (their light) and let it shine opened me up to become a life and business coach, spiritual counselor, and teacher. I also allowed my feelings to surface (all the ones I had shoved down inside). What was once pain was now a gift, because I realized that those experiences help me to relate with others who are experiencing pain. I can support others to understand and transform their suffering (like the teachers and healers who supported me in my process).
I went through a period of fear and sadness as I allowed myself to feel the feelings I’d buried, and became aware that I really believed I wasn’t good enough. I hadn’t realized that my beliefs of unworthiness had caused the suffering I had been experiencing. That pure awareness and allowing myself to really “feel” opened me up to start letting go of those dis-empowering beliefs and let new things come into my life.
I married a magnificent man who loves and respects me, and brings me joy. He had been interested in me for a while, but I didn’t feel that I was good enough for him. I finally surrendered, realizing what I was giving up by holding onto that belief. I started being the person I want to me. I identified what my passions are and I now pursue them. I still have challenges and there are times those beliefs of not being good enough surface. But now, I have an awareness of it and I can work through it, instead of being stuck in it. My potential keeps opening up more and more as I embrace it.
I see all around me people who live by what they think they’re supposed to do, rather than what their heart desires. Many people suffer from worthiness issues, from all age groups, genders and races. In this book, you’ll discover some of the ways unworthiness may be showing up in your life.
Many of the clients I’ve coached and counseled, and the participants of my workshops and tele-courses have contributed to this book, through the sharing of their responses of how these exercises and insights have supported them in living more joyful, fulfilling lives. I hope that you enjoy them too.
Stating Your “YES”
Everyone is the divine spark of Creator. My joy is in helping people connect with that spark, and experience a life of joy and fulfillment. This book is one way I am living my passion of helping others discover and live their true potential. As each person awakens to their divine truth and worth, the world becomes a more loving, united and peaceful place to be.