The Book of Revelations

This project happened by chance. I was standing in the bathroom, staring into the mirror and trying not to scream. It was January 1, 2010 and all around me people were waking up, crawling out of bed, nursing hangovers and making resolutions for the New Year. Not me. I was gawking at the mirror having a revelation. As the clarity began to really set in, I decided the only socially responsible thing to do was to take it to facebook. You know facebook, it’s a full-time job. As with nearly all status updates worth the nanoseconds it takes to read and LOL and hit the “like” button, I wanted to be both concise and clever. This being the first day of the twentieth year of my post-high school existence, I decided to preface my bathroom revelation “20 years Post-High School Revelation #1” and the rest is history.   January 1, 2010 #1: In my mind I am still 17; in the mirror I am not. What a jagged little pill that is... The revelation that started it all! I think we all suffer from our happy little delusions from time to time. The harshest part is that I still have the spirit and joie de vivre that I did twenty years ago but I lack the energy and the physicality. Ironically, my confidence is exponentially greater now than when I had the body to back it up. I suppose that’s nature’s twisted little joke. Talk about, “If I knew then what I know now...” Wow. January 2, 2010 #2: I really hate to drive but I still love Madonna. *keep on pushing my love over the borderline* I remember that I was sitting in the parking lot at the Credit Union trying desperately to be patient and wait for someone to take pity on me so I could turn left. The cars, they just kept coming out of nowhere! At that point, I hadn’t really planned to make a daily revelation but I was sitting there, singing along to the radio, and thinking how much I really hate to drive. It’s a necessary function of my day and it helps me avoid being car sick, but given the option I’d much prefer to not drive. It struck me that I did not feel that way at all in high school. Back in the day I could not wait to drive, but now? Not so much. Yet, I was still a true blue Madonna fan and so revelation #2 was born. January 3, 2010 #3: Back then I was afraid, I was petrified. I wore a smiling mask to hide the nerves inside. I spent oh so many years just hiding from myself, but now my smile is real and I'm not afraid to feel 'cause I know that I, I will survive! This was the day I thought, “Maybe I’ll make a revelation every day…” I knew I had something fun planned for the following day and I was just feeling full of piss and vinegar, as my mother used to say, so I stayed with the music theme. January 4, 2010 #4: If you wake your sister up early on the morning of your wedding and tell her you don't want to get married, it's best to just stay home that day. Life is too short and unpredictable to spend in an unhappy marriage.