Discipline
A Play
by
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LILLY
There’s a correct way to do everything; not that I would ever expect you to understand that.
HAROLD
What are you saying? Are you implying that I do not do things correctly?
LILLY
Did a light just go on?
HAROLD
Why, I do lots of things correctly.
LILLY
Really? Name one.
HAROLD (thinking.)
I shave. I get up in the morning and I shave, correctly.
LILLY
No you don’t.
HAROLD
Don’t be absurd, of course I do. I’ve been shaving my whole life. I shave correctly.
LILLY
I’ve watched you shave. You shave like a moron.
HAROLD
Why, that’s news. And how does a moron shave?
LILLY
You shave your entire face in one direction—down.
(She illustrates on her face.)
HAROLD
So, what’s your point?
LILLY
There are places you can’t reach by shaving down.
(She illustrates, puffing out her cheek and then her upper lip.)
You should shave up and down. Also, if you shave in both directions you won’t cut yourself the way you normally do.
HAROLD
When were you going to mention this?
LILLY
I’ve been meaning to.
HAROLD
I could have saved quarts of blood had you said something sooner.
LILLY
Sorry, slipped my mind.
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About the Book
“Compelling!”—Christopher Kompanek
Meet Harold Jenkins, a sexually frustrated man. Essentially isolated in his New York City apartment, he is helpless against the powers that control his every hour. He’s stuck in a rut of old habits, and that’s making things difficult with Lilly, his less-than-generous lady love. But for Harold, new possibilities arrive in the appearance of a mysterious stranger. He can’t quite figure out how to respond to this strange person he finds sniffling on his stove in the middle of the night.
Bewildered and confused, Harold is faced with a critical decision: will he succumb to the requirements dictated by the powers that be, or will he take control of his life in the only way he knows how? Harold has no problems taking matters into his own hands—and that’s part of the problem.
Discipline is a madcap comedy with a sympathetic mix of wit, banter, love, and frustration that flirts with the obsessions that can drive a man to madness.
About the Author
Gerard Bianco is the author of the award-winning mystery/thriller The Deal Master. He holds degrees in art and creative writing from the University of Southern Maine. He is an author, a playwright, a jewelry designer, and an artist. He lives in Portland, Maine, with Caterina and their two pups.